The Search For Love Starts With You
In honor of February, the month of love, I am re-sharing my story about becoming my own beloved. The reason I am sharing again is that the work has taken on a life of it’s own and created a movement for me personally. And as I speak with other experts in the field in preparation for the Self-Love Summit that starts on February 12th, they all speak to a similar theme. If they boiled down their own life experience and the work they do with others, it would all lead back to journey of self-love.
Here’s how my eight years of deep personal transformation came to a crescendo recently and how that moment changed everything about the quality of my life.
My personal journey took an interesting turn around the Winter Solstice this past December. I have spent years looking outside of myself for love, acceptance, and approval. Can any of you relate? I never fully understood what it meant to experience unconditional self-love until that fated day in the middle of December.
The Search For Love Brought Me To Myself
I had ended a romantic relationship that was on again and off again. He was clearly not the right guy for me, but I couldn’t seem to kick the habit of him. And then it happened! Saturday night, I had decided not to see him again and the desire to just go see him was overwhelming.
It was the holidays and I was alone again. After all, I have been divorced for eight years and just wanted a special someone with whom to share my life experiences. I felt crippled by the heartache that comes with ending a relationship and devastated to be facing the loneliness I was tired of feeling. Fortunately, in that moment, I didn’t go see him, and instead did a practice that literally changed my life.
I laid on the couch for hours, holding my heart and saying the words, “I love you” over and over again. I imagined that my soul was holding my heart. I spoke to myself like a small, frightened child. I let myself feel every emotion from the longing to be with a partner, the desire to be loved and cherished, and the heartache of never knowing love. I censored nothing and loved whatever arose in me.
The Moment When Everything Changed
A little over an hour later an amazing thing happened. I had the experience of becoming my own beloved. I felt such a rise of unconditional love for myself that I was moved to tears. The ache and longing for a life partner dissolved. The addictive quality of constant search for love subsided. And I felt held and nurtured by the deepest part of myself; my soul.
I experienced my own inner Divine Masculine that day. I felt protected, cared for, held, and supported during a really dark time. I didn’t go see the guy and a voice inside of me said gently, “Don’t go. He will crush your heart again. You deserve more.” That sense of protectiveness is a feeling that I had sought all of my life and never found.
I know that I healed a lineage of dark relationship history from my family in that moment. A lineage that was filled with overt male domination and aggression. I changed my own inner masculine parent. I created the voice in me that I had been longing to hear all of my life.
As a result, in my search for love I absolutely know that the next partner I attract will be very different than the list of romantic partners I have historically attracted.
Your Search For Love Should Lead You To Your Own Heart
The search for love outside of you is always an indication that your heart needs more love and attention. Sadly, too many fairy tales and television shows lead us to believe that we will find that love and attention somewhere out there.
In truth, the love we seek is always available within our own hearts. And the more we access this deep well of unconditional love, the more our external circumstances change. Whatever you are searching for and desiring absolutely matters. But first, tap into your own unconditional, loving heart; because doing so will change the quality of what you create in your external world.
Resources And Announcements
- The intro video to the Self-Love Summit. Let me tell you that after doing 5 of the interviews I am so psyched about the amazing information that will be available to you. The wisdom, ideas, and stories will move you. Every interview is so powerful and unique. And to top it off, I am finding themes emerging from all of the interviews. Watch the video to get the inside scoop!
- Please sign up for the free Self-Love Summit as a gift to yourself during the week of Valentine’s Day. Then help me spread the word by sharing the following link on your blogs, social media sites, and anywhere else you are willing to share. I am asking you to help me let others know about this important event! Here is the link to the information page about the Summit.
Ready to have support holding your heart and building a life that leaves you Vibrant. Imaginative. Unforgettable? Please schedule a discovery session with me using my online scheduling system. You will get the joy of creating a shift in your life and decide what happens from there.
If you would like the support of a Facebook community that is focused on supporting heart centered living, join Closeted Creatives Coaching. There are regular posts to inspire you, spark your imagination, help you become more vibrant, and lead a life that is as unique as your fingerprint.
Blessings on your journey of softening to and embracing your beautiful heart!